My World

"All the great ones start out sucking their thumbs." -Rachelle Gilbert (Dalley's aunt and former thumb sucker)

We have honestly had the best weekend with little Dalley. The past 3 weekends, Adam has only been able to come up on Friday night and then he leaves on Saturday morning. School has been very demanding this semester and he has needed the weekends to study. But this weekend was different. He had to meet his class in Salt Lake at the capital building early this morning, so he just stayed here the whole weekend. It was awesome.

Dalley has been acting more herself since she has been on the antibiotics. She's been more alert and active. Because Adam was here for the whole weekend, he was able to hold her for the second time. The first time he held her was very stressful. She was only 2 weeks old and only 1 pound. When he held her they were switching out her isolette (which they do every 2 weeks) and he held her as they moved all of the hoses and cords to the new isolette. However, when each cord or hose would come unplugged, an alarm would sound and the numbers on the monitor indicating if her heart was beating and how well she was saturating turned to zero. It was horrible. We didn't know if she was breathing or not.

This time holding her was much more enjoyable for Adam. It was enjoyable to Dalley as well. This made it also enjoyable for me. I love holding my baby. I could do it all day long... but this.... This right here, is what makes my heart want to leap out of my chest.

"I want to hold your hand."

"Hey Dad, can I have a pony?" - Dalley

This little wonder is now 2 lbs 10 oz. Our nurse today was Lisa. Lisa is one of our primary nurses. Lisa is AMAZING! She never tells me things I "want" to hear. She tells things to me straight. I hate it. And I love it. Mostly I love it. If there is anything that is bothering her about Dalley, she will tell me and then get to work to figure out what is going on. She has earned the nickname of "Infection Ninja" from me. If Dalley has an infection, Lisa will find it. (Even if nobody else believes us..... ahem, ahem, cough, cough).

When I asked her today how things were going and how Dalley looked, her reply was, "She looks really good! She is looking like a baby and not so much like a preemie."

Those words. Those glorious words. "She's looking like a baby and not so much like a preemie"!

The doctors and nurses have told us that MOST premature babies get out of the NICU around their due date.... except really early preemies. They tend to get out later. They told us that we can probably plan on being here 1 to 2 months past our due date. Our due date was April 11, which may put us here in the NICU into May or June.

That seems like such a long time, but I will stay in here for years if that means she gets to come home with us.

These two people are my world. My soul is starting to heal. I can feel it. I will never forget the loss I have felt and the people who are no longer here that still should be. But this tiny human and this amazing man are filling so many holes in my broken heart.